Friday, June 3, 2005

Beat of her own music

Yesterday was my baby's first day of Pre-K summer school. I couldn't wait to find out about her first day when we got home.

So Megan, how was school?
"I hate it Mom. Do I have to go back?"

Great, this is not the vision I had for her in school. Better find out why she hated it so much.

"Because we have to sit at our desks all the time and do what the teacher says."

Therein lies the 'problem'. My free spirited Megan was bucking the system, rebelling against the rules and balking at routine. Megan has always marched to the beat of her own music doing things in her own time, in her own way, with her own sense of style. School, with it's rules, and limitations was just a bit too stifeling for her. While Megan's world marches on in 6/8 time, school wants her to dance in 4/4 time. All of which clashes desperately with Megan's internal metronome.

Megan has always had her own time. Her conception was a year earlier than her father and I had planned. Her development has never been 'by the book', some things she did early, some things late. Some days she insists on being the leader of the pack and taking charge of the activities for her older brother and sister. Some days she's content to sit back and allow them to lead.

Megan has never 'conformed'. She always thinks outside the box. Who says you can't have ice cream for dinner once in a while? Who says you can't wear stripes with plaids, they both have lines? Who says you can't eat mashed potatoes and gravy for breakfast? When asked 'Why?' she is likely to answer with 'Why not?'

So, while forces beyond my control dictate that I put her in public school, I pray they recognise the gift that she is. I pray that their rules and routines don't sufficate and squash her free spirit. I pray that she always maintains her own time, her own style, her individuality. I hope that they recognise that her anwers to their questions may not always be the answers they are looking for, but they are not wrong either.

Megan will never see things as Black and white, she will always see things is various shades of gray. I hope she never loses her own music of her life.

March on Megan, what ever tempo your heart desires.

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