Wednesday, May 10, 2006

So brave (from behind a tree and a mom)

So, I’m sitting at my computer last night editing photos from the latest practice photo shoot with the kids.  Tate is already tired of the camera, but she’s been in front of one all of her life.  Newt suffers from the Last Baby Syndrome, and there are precious few pictures of her, so she loves to shine in front of the camera.  Anyway, back to my story…

I’m sitting there editing pictures, when Newt bursts through the door.  Newt never does anything calmly, quietly or ladylike, it’s always full on, drama, drama, drama with her (I’ll tell the tick story later…remind me.) Anyway, Newt is bursting through the front door, “Mom you better come quick, Ian’s about to get into a fight.”.  Well, since everything is always so over dramatic for Newt, I didn’t fly out the door, I casually walked. Besides, I thought it might be a smidge entertaining to see who was going to ‘fight’ my son and how my son was going to handle it.  I mean after all, what better place to have your first fight than right at home where Mom can jump in and save your butt if you’re losing, and take care of any battle wounds immediately.  

I walk outside, and the kid who was bound and determined to ‘kick his ass’ saw me and took off.  Not running, but walking, so I followed.  After all, my editing session had just been interrupted for this, I wanted to see a good fight, or at least a little verbal sparring.

The kid takes off and HIDES behind a tree.  I’m calling after him, ‘So, you want to kick my son’s ass?”
Because I can
Think so?
I know I can
Well, then bring your bad self up here and do it.
I don’t want to now, I changed my mind.
Hell no I ain’t scared.
Then why are you hiding behind a tree
I ain’t hiding.
Well, then why did you leave when I showed up?
I felt like it.
Then you really didn’t want to kick his ass, did you?
Hell yeah, Still do. I’ll kick yours too.
Then bring it.
You bring it.
I’m here, waiting for you. You’re the one who left, you walked away.  I’m just sitting here waiting to see a good fight.

Then Bo pipes up “Yeah, Bring it!  Go on, Bring it. You’re just scared.”
I looked at him in total disbelief.  I said to my son, ‘Shut. up.  You’re hiding behind your mother, and now you’re going to get brave?  Son, you didn’t stand a chance of winning this fight.  Shut. up.’  I hate to admit that I had such little faith in my son, but damn, this boy isn’t nearly as tough as he wants everyone to believe.  You bump into him and he yells ‘Ow”.  Can you imagine the drama if that other kid had actually thrown and landed a punch?  There would have been more drama from Bo than even Newt could come up with.

It was so funny, both boys thought they were tough, and they were going to knock each other around for awhile just to prove it. But as soon as I showed up, they both ran and hid.  Oh they could talk the talk, from behind a tree and behind me, but couldn’t take the first step to walk the walk.

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