Monday, March 5, 2007

Actions speak louder than words

I got hung up on words last week. Oh, no, not saying them. We all know I have no problem finding words to spout off with. No, I got hung up on my need want to hear those three magical words from B.

Yes, it was selfish on my part. Thank god I threw my little temper tantrum with M instead of voicing all of this to Batman.

When I got done pouting about the fact that he's just not there yet, and the words I want to hear him say won't be said for a while just yet. I sat down and realized something even better.

He may not be able to say those three words to me just yet (for a lot of reasons, all of which I know and understand) but that doesn't mean he doesn't feel those feelings. You might ask (or maybe not, but I did) If he feels it why won't he say it? The truth is? He does say it, just not with words.

He does so many things for me that show me, tell me, how he feels, if I would just shut up long enough to hear it.
Just this morning, at 7:00 he called me. I, of course, asked him "What's wrong?"
Nothing's wrong why would something be wrong?
Because you don't call me in the morning usually.
Well, not in a while, but I wanted to call to see how your morning's going.
And he stayed on the phone with me listening to me get the girls out the door, get gas, drop the girls off at school, and drive to work. He shared a good 45 minutes of my morning with me.

He calls me every night after work, on his way home, just to share his day with me. He chats with me on Yahoo during the day, if we both have time. He calls me every night before we go to sleep to tell me Sweet Dreams. He calls me several times on my drive to his house, to see where I am, and to tell me Please be careful.

In Florida, he got up every morning, and drove to the gas station near by to get us both huge cups of coffee, and gave me time to get in the shower and get started on my morning routine (which is so much longer and extensive than his).

He understood one afternoon, that my hair had gotten mussed and out of sorts when we were taking a nap (really we did take a nap) and he waited patiently, without bitching at all, while I took another shower and redid my hair and make up from the very beginning again (that's an hour wait time folks...seriously). But he knew I would be less than comfortable, (I would be miserable) if I went out to dinner with him that night, looking less than great.

He knew I hated my hair for most of my life, so he stepped up and took care of the problem. I have loved my hair every day since then. (And I have said Thank you to him every week since then too).

He got his hair cut last week, and the place that did his hair, also did mani's and pedi's and facials, and massages, and he told me, 'If you're good, I'll spring for a day here for you, with the works.' and I know that he will do it.

He made me tell him about my trip to Daytona last year, especially all the bad parts, so that he could do things completely different and make this year's trip so much better for me. (And he did)

He made arrangements for me to have a shopping buddy one day, he has found the latest uber-awesome photo-editing software for me, he is saving me a ton of $$ by trying to fix my PC for me...seriously, I could go on and on about all the things he's done for me. The bottom line is he may not use words to say I love you, he finds other ways. And if I would just shut up and be quiet, I could (and do) hear them. Every. Single. Day.

5 comments:

Dixie said...

Hang on to him! Wish my man were that thoughtful!

Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

Amen!

That simple, key phrase of "actions speak louder than words" made me completely forget about the fact that NS had never actually said those words to me. I knew how he felt because of how he treated me and the things he did for me and the plans he had for us. So, when he decided to give the words to me as a Christmas gift, I cried because I knew without any doubt that he meant them and made a special effort to let me know.

I imagine the day he does say the words to you again will be a very special one because his actions have already told you they are true;>

Becky said...

I know that when he says them to me again, he will mean them, even more than he did before. I have no doubt that he will say them again, I just don't know when. It's the universe's time we're on, not mine, and once again I am being taught patience.

Sparky Duck said...

see words are just words

Anonymous said...

What a wise woman you are! It took eight years for DH and I to figure this out. Actually there are five love languages.

Physical Touch
Acts of Service
Time
Words of Affirmation
And Gifts

We do all these, but have a dominate one. Mine is time and words of affirmation. DH is touch and time. Find each others love language and go for it! Oh! And it goes for the kiddos too!