Just Venting and Ranting

*DISCLAIMER* This is my personal blog. My On-line journal. I choose to make it public and choose to allow people to read it for entertainment purposes. After all, my life is just a camera crew shy of a reality TV show...or a soap opera... your choice. The views and opinions expressed here are just that MY OPINIONS and are therefore covered by the First Amendment and Freedom of Speech. If you don't like what I write here, feel free to click that cute little X in the top right hand corner of your computer screen and see your way out of here. If you chose to stay, understand these are my opinions. You don't have to agree with them, but you can not shut me up.

Having said that, I am going to rant here. A lot. So sit down, get comfortable, and hold on. It's gonna be a bumpy ride.

I got an email today from C1 regarding my blog.

In the interest of keeping things between us civil and the lines of communication open, you need to stop writing about me. While you are certainly free to express whatever opinions you wish, making false statements and omitting facts to make yourself look better is an entirely different matter. If you should choose not to stop, I will be forced to defend myself by whatever means my attorney and I deem necessary.

I have written several scathing replies to this email but never sent any of them. Why? What's the point? To argue a moot point with him? I have the right to post what I want, and I'm not going to argue with someone who thinks he's always right.

But, I do need to get this out of my system. I do need to formulate some response just so I can move on. What better place to do that than right here. so you all can enjoy my amusing wit. (besides, if I leave it in my email drafts, I'll be tempted to send it.)

My comments will be in Red. Just so you know.

In the interest of keeping things between us civil and the lines of communication open, you need to stop writing about me. In the interest of keeping things civil and the lines of communication open? Uh yeah, the lines of communication only seem to go one way. From you to me. You dictating to me how I am supposed to live my life, and parent our child. Our divorce has been final for over 10 years now. Last time I looked at the papers, it says that I was granted the same freedom you were... and that is the freedom to live my life free from any harrassment and interference from you. So WTF? Here you are telling me what I need to do. You, had you *asked* me to stop writing about you, I would have considered it. But since you have told me what I need to do, well, who the fuck are you to tell me what I need to do? While you are certainly free to express whatever opinions you wish, making false statements and omitting facts to make yourself look better is an entirely different matter. Making false statements. If you would be so kind as to point out which false statements you are specifically referring to I will either A) Defend the validity of those statements or B) take them down if I can not prove them. As for omitting facts to make me look better... Hello? My blog, my spin doctor. I'll spin the situation any way I see fit and yeah, you can bet I'm going to spin it in my direction. Feel free to post comments of your own on here disputing my version of things. Feel free to start your own blog and spin things in your direction. I think you suffer from a GOD complex, in which you think you are God, and you can control me, my actions and my life. I don't believe in God. Therefore, I don't believe in you. If you should choose not to stop, I will be forced to defend myself by whatever means my attorney and I deem necessary. Defend yourself from what, pray tell? Exactly what/who are you going to defend yourself against? People you've never met? People who read my blog. OK, first of all, I don't use your real name. Therefore the only people who could possibly know your true identity are those who are close to me in real life. Those people already know you, and have formed their own opinions of you. I'm sure they are closer to my opinion of you than they are to your own opinion of yourself. But they are free to form their own opinions because..guess what? They have their own minds. And there is nothing you can do to stop that. There are I'm sure, a lot of other people from around the world (Yes around the world...the whole entire world) that read this blog. They don't know you from Adam, or Joe Blow on the street. And I'm sure they don't care to either. This is a place for me to vent and it's for entertainment purposes only. Defend yourself. It's a well documented fact that the Supreme Court of the United States has failed time and time again to legislate and control what is on the internet. Why? Yeah, because to do so would interfere with everyone's freedom of speech. Just because you don't like what I say and don't agree with what I say does not give you the right to stop me from saying it. The only right you have in regards to that is to once again, click that cute little X in the top right hand corner of your computer screen and see your way out of here.

Thursday 13 #13

13 Stupid News stories I read this week.

1. VA Patient has wrong testicle removed. Can you say malpractice?

2. Mayor chases rivals wife over sign. Not the best election campaign tactic to use.

3. Woman on horseback charged with DUI. But ossifer, he’s the designated driver.

4. Student who moons teacher sues school district. Geez some people just can’t take a joke.

5. Coyote visits Chicago sandwich shop. He was hot and tired from chasing Roadrunner.

6. Couple fights to name baby Metallica. That kid is so gonna bitch slap them when she gets older.

7. Judge OKs trucker’s new name: Ynot Bubba. I guess Dumbass McGraw was taken. Oh, and Hey, I’d like to meet Metallica. I think you and her parents could be great friends.

8. Man arrives at DUI hearing drunk. At least he’s consistant.

9. Keith Richards: I snorted my father. We know this is a lie, he would never cut his coke with anything.

10. Kinkajou flees zoo, bites bus passenger. They are taking this pokemon thing way too far.

11. Japanese police probe decomposing bodies. It’s a nasty job but somebody has to do it.

12. Deputies but toe and tow together. Hit and run? Yeah, I don’t think so.

13. Chicago suit charges ‘negligent dancing’. My guess? This is not the first time she’s been dropped on her head.

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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If you want to know

If you want to know where I've been lately, email me, I just might tell ya.

Thursday 13 (#12)

13 Things that are on my desk

1. A plastic cup from the cafeteria that Newt drank Sprite out of the day she came to work sick with me.

2. A empty Rockstar can from yesterday.

3. A half full Rockstar from today.

4. My travel coffee mug

5. A now empty Mr. Pibb bottle

6. The lid from the above mentioned soft drink bottle.

7. The empty wrapper from my Little Debbie Peanut Butter Bars (breakfast/lunch)

8. My flat iron. (Humidity is a bitch on my hair, no matter what I do)

9. Kalisha's Mirror (so I can flat iron my hair from my desk instead of the Ladies room down the hall)

10. Nail strengthener.

11. Nail file. (a girl's gotta look pretty at all times)

12. A pack of gum with only 1 piece left in it.

13. Flyers for the craft show this weekend.

(Did anyone notice there was not a single bit of work on my desk. Such is my job).


Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)



Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Thursday 13 (#11)

13 Reasons I love Spring

1. NO MORE SNOW! Read through the archives of this blog, read all about my hatred of Mother Nature this winter. I know, I once said "If it's going to snow, it better snow so damn deep nobody can get out. Baring that, then stay off the roads and the sidewalks." Little did I know someone was actually listening, and decided this year, it was snow asshole deep. That will teach me to open my mouth again.

2. Spring Showers. Rain. I love the smell of the earth after it rains. Everything is washed clean, and fresh, and the earth and grass and flowers smell so much more pungent.

3. The smell of freshly cut grass. Bring on the rain, so the grass will grow, grow, grow. Then people will have to mow, mow, mow (I live in an apartment complex...no yards, no grass to mow).

4. Spring Training. That means, soon, it will be Baseball season, and the Cardinals will be once again rocking Bush Stadium (and what's up making that place smoke free? It's an outdoor park!)

5. Sandals. I am tired of socks and shoes. Tired of boots and chunky heals. I want to wear my cute little strappy sandals.

6. Pedicures. With cute little strappy sandals, you have to have cute pedicures with bright colors. Nothing says spring like 'Carribean Experience' on your tootsies.

7. Capris. Gotta have some cute little capris to go with the pedi and the strappy sandals.

8. Daylight Savings Time. Yes, once my body has adjusted to the new schedule, I love it. Why? There's still daylight when I get the kids home, and that means we have time to go out and snap off some pictures. I've been away from my camera far too long.

9. Motocross. Scooter has his first race of the season this weekend. He hasn't been on his bike all winter and I know he's dying to get back on it and back on the track. Yes, this means weekends will be busy, but it's Scooter, and it's fun and important to him, so we go. And love it.

10. Warmer temperatures. That means, the winter coats are put away. The furnace is turned off (lower electric bill) and the windows are thrown wide open.

11. Countdowns. The kids are counting down how long they have left in school. Summer vacation is on the horizon. My countdown to moving.

12. Spring Flowers. I can't keep flowers alive to save my life. I never plant flowers, and god forbid you give me a potted plant, I'll kill it. I kill silk flowers. But seeing them out in other people's yard, just gives the place a friendly look, a fresh happy look. And I love the rebirth of the trees, the flowers, everything.

13. The kids can play outside. They have cabin fever. They are tired of their videos, and their games, and frankly, each other. I can send them outside to yell and scream and run off steam. And they sleep better at night. And it's quiet. Oh the blessed quiet.




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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Lady's Grand Adventure

That, my blogging friends, is an actual picture of Lady. She is still missing. The adults have come to the conclusion that someone saw her early on the day she ran, and picked her up, took her home, and fell in love with her. I hope that she's in a loving home and they take care of her, if we're not going to get her back.

Scooter, on the other hand hasn't given up hope that she's still running lost somewhere and that someone will call with news that they have her. He misses her very much, and her absence is felt clear to his heart.

So, this picture is posted on a lost pets website Findthatpet.com (the above picture is a link directly to Lady's page). Lady is posted on several websites, at every gas station, at every bar, at the post office, the grocery store and the groomers place of business. She almost has as many posters of her out there as there are possible daddy's for Anna Nicole's Baby.

I'm asking all of my readers if you have friends, family, readers, anyone in Lincoln County Mo, who could possibly see this, please send a link to this, or send a link to Lady's page on the FindThatPet.com to them. Scooter is just broken up about this and the more eyes that see her picture, the greater the odds are that someone will recognize her and she'll come home. I know this is a long shot, but if we can tell Scooter that we've done this he will feel that we are still trying to find her and haven't given up on her.

Thursday Thirteen #10

13 Things I love about My Daughter Tate

Tate turned 10 last Saturday, and she's the middle child, so sometimes she gets lost in the shuffle. So this week, I'm going to list 13 things I love about her.

1. Tate is the quiet one, but they say that still waters run deep, and Tate is that personified. She has always been the one to sit back and pretend to be completely disinterested in what is going on around her, but she always is very aware of what is going on.

2. Tate is a great 'mother hen' to the younger kids at the sitter's. (Not her sister, but the other kids). She will always walk away from the group to play with the little ones so that they feel like a Big Kid too.

3. She believes that the world and life should be fair. She is still wearing her rose colored glasses of childhood. I know that eventually those glasses will come off and she will see the world for what it really is. Until that day, she is full of hope.

4. Tate is at that age, just teetering on the brink of leaving childhood behind, and yet not quite ready to step into teenhood (Is that a word? It is today). Too old to play with babies and toys, and yet, too young still for make up and boys.

5. Tate is beautiful inside and out and she is completely oblivious to this fact. She doesn't see it, and she doesn't believe it. I hope she holds on to that for a little while longer.

6. I don't believe that will be much longer, as I see hints of the prima donna that I know is coming. She is already asking for high lights and to have her nails done, and Mom how old do I have to be before I can go tan? (Uh, when you can pay for it)

7. She is going to be a domestic goddess, although I think Domestic Diva may be more fitting. She loves to cook, and do dishes (freak) and yet, she can not for the life of her keep her room clean more than 5 minutes.

8. Tate has a wicked sense of humor too. She laughs and jokes with everyone and her laugh is magical. When she laughs her eyes twinkle with mischief and trouble.

9. Looks can be deceiving. She can play innocent better than OJ did at his trial. Her problem is, she can not do it consistently, or for any length of time. Her laugh and her eyes always give her away.

10. At the end of the day, she can not go to bed without hugging and kissing me good night. By the time her brother was this age, he was too old and too big for hugs and kisses from him mom. But Tate still allows them, and insists on them.

11. Sometimes if I get lucky, Saturday morning will find Tate curled up in bed with me before the rest of the gang wakes up. Those few quiet minutes when it's just her and me, are rare, and I treasure them immensely. I hope that they continue well into her teen years.

12. She still thinks boys are stupid and gross and that suits me just fine.

13. The best reason I love Tate, is simply for the fact that she is Tate.

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Please explain to me.....

* Why my girls never hear anything I say to them until the 4th time I say it. Unless it has to do with shopping, or junk food. Then they hear better than bats with radar.

* How "Put your coat/clothes/shoes/stuff away" translates into "Throw all of your stuff on the floor of your bedroom".

*Then please explain how it is once that stuff hits their bedroom floor it instantly becomes invisible to the naked eye under the age of 15.

* How am I supposed to wash clothes that never make it from the bedroom floor to the laundry room.

* Please explain to me, slowly so that I understand exactly, how it is my fault when they have nothing to wear because nothing got washed, and how they can not be blamed for any of this.

* Why we have to have this same conversation every single week, and this week is no exception. And I know that none of it sunk in this time either, so go ahead and schedule this same meeting of the minds for next week. And the next week. and the week after that.

* Why am I still expected to pay for my son's lunches even though his father has sole custody of him and has cut my child support in half. How is it that he gets to make all decisions and have final say in everything Bo does, but I still have to pay for his lunches?

* Why am I always the "Bad" parent, because I never have the money to go out to eat, go to the movies, buy them the designer clothes, and name brand shoes everyone is wearing.

* Please explain to me how I am supposed to explain the realities of my life to my children, while not ripping the rose colored glasses from their naive faces when it comes to their waste of space fathers.

Painterville

Just a little over an hour left to my day, and it might as well be forever. It's too nice outside to be stuck inside, but that is where I am. In a windowless office, that is too hot, and too quiet. I have a whole lot of nothing to do, and all afternoon to get it done. I apparently have even more nothing to say, as I can not think of a single thing to blog about.

Batman hasn't been on-line today because apparently, when it's warm outside, all the painters in Painterville, open the windows and the fumes are less concentrated, and they actually have semi-coherent thoughts that resemble "I need more paint". Needless to say, it has been very busy in Painterville today. On top of that, Fat Boy (the big boss) is in town, and no one knows exactly where he is or where he's likely to be. He could show up at any moment so Batman has to be on his toes (and therefore, not on Yahoo.) *pouting*.

So, I apologize for the *yawn* boring posts today. Just not much going on in my world, or in my head (no comments from the peanut gallery there...shut up). Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

Spring

Did you see the forecast for this week? Didja? Totally rockin.

I went home last night and opened my windows, all of them. And left them open. All. Night. Long. They're still open. The furnace has been turned off, never to be turned on again (as long as I live there).

I watched The Cards play baseball this weekend. On TV. The sun was shining, the warm breeze was blowing and the Cardinals were playing on the tube. AAAHHHHH Spring.

Batman and I woke up Sunday morning, and went out on the balcony to watch the sunrise and give birth to a new day. And I knew I had come home again. I looked over the landscape I had stared out over this past summer, and felt everything settle and I knew all was right in my world.

It is spring time. A time for rebirth, new beginnings, fresh starts. I have less than 3 months left, before my move. I am starting to spend more time looking forward, towards my future, and less time looking back over my shoulder.

A new day has dawned. It's gonna be a great one.

A letter to Mother Nature

Mother Nature,
Remember all those hateful awful things I said about you 2 months ago? And remember how much I hated you, and would curse you, and rant and rage at you? Yeah, Well, I forgive you. and I'm sorry.

Oh, yeah, and remember all those CUTE clothes I bought for my trip to Florida, and it was too cold to wear them while I was there? Yeah, I'll be wearing the hell out of them this week.

I hate government at work

Where is the logic in the government agency who is set up to collect child support from dead beat dad's, is just as deadbeat as the dads?

Why the f@#k are we protecting his rights? HELLO! You're job is to get that money from him. When you do, you don't get to keep that shit!!! It's not your money! You are just as bad as he is. He's not paying his child support, so we'll take his money. BUT we won't give it to his children!!

WTF!!!!

He's so far behind and they are just perpetuating the whole situation allowing him to get further and further behind, and they have the GD money and won't let us have it!!!

NOT FOR ANOTHER FUCKING MONTH!

Happy Birthday Tate!

Happy Birthday Tate! Saturday was her 10th birthday. I missed out on it, because she was with her dad, but that just means we will celebrate tonight.

I went birthday shopping for her this weekend, with Batman. I got her this movie, and this cd. Batman got her this DVD.

I called her on her birthday, and of course, true to form, Slug wouldn't answer his phone. So I left a message. "I am just calling to talk to the Birthday girl and wish her a Happy Birthday. Please have her call me."

Of course, he didn't. 3 hours later, I called him back, and just as it was about to go to voice mail, he answered the phone. "Yeah, what?"
I so so so wanted to say "You know what, a$$hole" but I refrained. I asked again, "May I please talk to Tate?"

So he put her on the phone and we talked about the birthday party TFC threw for her, and all the presents she got. And then, it happened.

Dad Batman asked to wish her a Happy Birthday. She loves him, like a grandfather. She misses him more than she can put into words. I have a gazillion letters she has written to him in the three months Batman and I were not together. I am sure she was surprised and more than thrilled to talk to him. He even told her "I am hoping, and I'm pretty sure, we'll be seeing you around here again soon." (Which is what she wants) The problem was, Slug was standing right there hovering over her, so she had to remain unemotional and guarded.

Then Batman got on the phone and wished her a Happy Birthday. I didn't hear that convo, he went off to another room to talk to her.

And to top it off? Yup, Mom Batman got on the phone and wished Sweetie a Happy Birthday.

So, all in all, it was a good day. There was a lot of satisfaction in the entire Batman clan talking to her and wishing her a Happy Birthday. There was more satisfaction in knowing Slug was there, knew what was going on and was helpless to stop it, or he'd look like a jealous, insecure, controling a$$.

Don't you hate it when

Silence speaks louder than any words can? And the demons come crawling out of the dark caves they had been banished to. Adding their whispered doubts, and fears, and insecurities to the already swirling emotions tumbling around in your head?

Yeah.. I do too.

Unbelievable...

Have you seen this?

Watching it on the news yesterday, made me sick, and pissed me off. I'm serious, like WTF? OK, I know hockey is a sometimes violent game, but this?

He was suspended for 25 games. He won't play for the rest of this season. 25 games? Barely a slap on the wrist for this. Seriously. The man (and I used that term loosely) does not belong on the ice. EVER. Again. Period.

GPS

Lady is still on her walk about, and now I know that she is without her tags. She got spooked at the groomers and got out of her collar, and ran off. She does have the micro chip in her. But that only does any good if the people who find her know about this technology and take her in to a vet's office.

Calls have been made to the vets in the area, the animal control shelters, and the newspapers and radio stations. Even the police department has been called.

When the police department was called, Mom Batman explained that Lady had the micro chip in her, and if she was found she could be scanned at the vets and all her information would be readily available.

Seriously, without missing a beat, the gentleman she was talking to on the phone, asked her, "If she has the microchip in her neck, can't you just turn on the GPS tracking and find her?"

Damn, why didn't we think of that?

ETA: For those of you wondering, it doesn't work that way. There is no GPS in those microchips. The dog's owner's contact information is encoded on the chip and it can only be read by certain types of scanners.

Let's play a game

I got this in an email today, and while I sent it to a lot of my friends and family, I know there is no way I got it out to everyone who is my friend here in Bloggerittaville. And I thought it would make a great blog post....

Describe me in just one word. That's it. Just leave your single word answer in the comments section, I will add them below

M said Sarcastic
My dad said Daughter
Melissa said Couragous (thanks, M. That means a lot to me. I take that as a huge complement)
Celebrate Woo-Hoo said the obvious Margarita! (yes, that is a great word)
~Kathryn~ said Funny
Sassy said Friendly
TN Becky said Strong
Dixie said Strong too
Chickie says Tough (and I'm not sure how to take that)
Rainwolf says Complex

Gloomy Gus and the dark, dank, dreadful day

I'm sorry I seem to be oh so pessimistic today. It should be a great day! Hello? It's Friday, and even though it's kinda rainy outside, it's not snowing and it's not cold. It's Friday, and I'm off to spend the weekend with Batman.

And there is the storm cloud on my sunny day. I love that man more than I can express, but damn he's been Mr. Gloom and Doom, and he just can't shake this funk.

OK, before you all start with the hate mail, I get that losing a pet can be traumatic and devastating, but until we know exactly what happened to her ( and we don't) let's not give up hope that she has found a new family who will love her until she can find her way back. Let's keep hoping for the positive, instead of already assuming the worst.

Fine, you want to be Gloomy Gus, go right ahead, and throw yourself that pity party you're dying to have. You have all damn day to wallow in it. But when I get there tonight, there will be no talk of doom, and gloom, there will be no tears, there will only be hope and good thoughts and prayers. (unless we find out the worst, then all bets are off).

I love you B, but damn, pick yourself up and find some hope here. There's plenty out there. Grab ya some.

Third time's the charm? or The Perfect Trifecta?

Remember this fiasco? How about this one? Well, apparently the dumbass lawyer and C1 are hoping that the third time is a charm. Anyone want to lay odds, they end up making it a perfect trifecta instead?

We have a court date, next week, (that nobody bothered to inform me about) Good thing I like to check into our on-line court database every so often 3 days. Otherwise I would have never known I was required to show up at court and testify to all this bullshit and get this finally over with.

Three months. It has taken them three months to get a court date. Now if there will be a judge sitting that day is anybody's guess, but we've got 50/50 odds. Which with Dumb and dumber running this dog and pony show it's bound to be a three ring circus.

Riddle me this. Why do I bother?

I'm trying to put good karma out in the universe.

Newt is very excited about reading a whole book all by herself last night. I wanted her father to know up front so he could feign the proper amount of excitement and praise for her efforts. It's a big deal to her, and he needs time to practice his I-give-a-shit look. (sad really)

Tate's birthday is tomorrow. She waited until this morning to tell me she wanted to take goodies to school for her class. Well, hell, I can work miracles, but cookies/brownies, and goodie bags complete with stickers, and balloons and candy and pencils are just not flowing abundantly out of my back side at the moment. I just couldn't do it with a mere 15 minute warning. So, it was high drama today. Until I explained to her the glory of having a birthday that falls on a weekend. Besides the obvious (longer recover time) she can celebrate either Friday OR Monday. And now that I know this is a life or death situation, I can come up with some fantabulously awesome goodies by Monday and have them there before school starts.

I tried to explain this to The Slug too, how he has breezed by, once again, and had avoided having to participate in anything remotely birthday or parentally aligned. I would once again be handling all the birthday details for school, so he wouldn't have to strain himself (or spend a dime of his precious money) to do anything for her.

What did I get for my efforts?

Jack shit.

Nothing.

"Uh, why did you bother me with this shit?"

Exactly.

The Grand Adventure Continues

No, that's not Lady, but it looks like Lady, or rather, she looks like that beauty there. And she's still missing.

The possibilities are endless. The collar could have gotten caught and come off and no one knows who she is. Someone could have seen her beside the high way and taken her home with them. Maybe she had a hot date and well, is nursing a hang over (but you would think she would have waited until after the day at the spa instead of leaving before the beauty treatment).

All I know is that Batman and Scooter have lost their baby, their best friend, and they just can't seem to climb out of the doom and gloom funk they are in.

Batman got up and left the house at 4:30 this morning and drove the LONG way to work, down the semi major highway by the groomer's looking for her. The bad news? He didn't find her. The good news? He didn't find her. There is still hope.

They don't want hope, they want Lady back. I hope she's having a grand adventure where ever she is, but damn bitch can't you call home and let everyone know you're ok?

The doors to the world are beginning to open

Newt is in first grade. She is just learning how to read, and sometimes having a rough go at it. But she tries, really hard.

Last night, I dug out A Giraffe and a Half by Shel Silverstein. His books are as easy and fun to read as any Dr. Suess books. They rhyme, they are nonsensical and they're funny. The kids (mine anyway) love them.

If you had a giraffe and stretched him by half you would have a giraffe and a half.

If he found a hat, and inside lived a rat, then you would have a giraffe and a half with a rat in a hat.

You get where this is going? Yeah, you end up with a giraffe and a half, with a rat in a hat, a rose on his nose, a bee on his knee, looking cute in a suit and a bunch of other things that rhyme but I can't remember.

So last night, Newt and I sat there reading this book. I would read the simple two line sentence to give her the two rhyming words (being sure to point them out to her so she could see them and hear them) and she would read the whole long list of things (that grew with every page turn). The longer that list grew, the more excited she got when she could read the entire page with little or no help from me.

She had to get sister out of the bath last night to read to her. She had to tell grandma all about it this morning on the phone. That child read that entire book 3 times over last night. All.By.Herself.

Now, that she's learning to read, the possibilities are endless......

Ultimate Blog Party comes to an end

It has been a busy busy week here in Bloggeritaville. So many parties to attend, so many margaritas to drink, so many hang overs to avoid (have another drink...stay drunk). At the beginning of the blog party I was so gung-ho about visiting as many blogs as I could. But then I realized that I was tired and cranky and smelly from lack of sleep, food and showers. The kids were threatening mutiny too, so I had to get back to my real life.

But I did meet lots of new bloggers, who's blogs I will be going back to often. Let me introduce you to some of my new friends.

First and foremost is RaceMom. She's a WAHM, who is the same age I am, and BONUS she lives really close by. Her family is as into racing as Batman and I are. Her family races midgets, (those are cars, not the little people) and Scooter races motocross, but any race fan knows, speed is speed and it doesn't matter if it's cars, trucks, boats or bikes, racing is racing. I'm hoping Batman and I can get down to her neck of the woods this summer and catch a race with her and her family.

There is also The Queen of Dirty Laundry. I first went to her blog because the name sounds so much like my life, and anyone who claims to be the queen of dirty laundry has to have a wicked sense of humor. I go back to her blog, because she is so down to earth, and funny, and she writes a little like me.

Please meet Jenn who is desperately Trying to stay alive and keep her wits about her. This woman is nothing if not dedicated. She came home from a vacation in Puerto Rico with her honey to host this blog party for us. (well, not really just for this reason, but it sounded good). I loved the title of her blog, and go back to visit, because she just writes from her heart, from her day to day experience, and she keeps it real.

How could I not go to the blog titled It's just the coffee talking? She was ready to give up blogging at one point, and had actually walked away for 2 days when 2 major coffee companies contacted her and offered her coffee and $$ to try their product and blog about it. HELLO? Sign me up. Anyone who loves coffee as much as I do, is ok in my book.

Please go check out My Glamorous Life. Much like me she spent the first part of the blog party visiting lots of people, and by the end of the week had hit Blogger's Block, and had nothing to write about. Oh, how I can relate (have you seen the piss poor posts I've had in the past 2 days?) When all else fails...do a brain dump. She did, and came up with a great post. I did and found it empty. Hhmmm.

I love Cupcake over at A Universally Acknowledged Truth. Her blog posts about the mothers who are uh, difficult, was perfect, and it was just the hook that got me to come back again and again.

Becca wrote a hilariously agonizing post about her son's math homework. Anyone who can make light and laugh at math story problems, has to be cool. I love her blog. Go check her out.

For those of you who don't mind the occasional F-bomb (and I know who you are, you visit here often enough) go read Erica. Her newest post is all about how her wax lady got fired and it's all her fault. (and we're not talking waxing her legs here folks). Erica is just wild enough and just *umph* I'd love to hang with her.

Stephanie is a young single mom to a beautiful 6 month old angel. Being a single mom is not easy. Being single and that young, with so much of your life still ahead of you, takes courage and strength, and this girl has both in spades. (I hope she knows this, if not, I hope she figures it out).

Jamie apparently went to the store, and while she was gone, I went and checked out her blog. I love a woman who will admit that her favorite thing to do is read blogs. She admits to that dirty little secret and the very next blog post is all about her bathroom. Doesn't get much more real than that.

So those are just a few of the blogs I stalked visited during this week long blog party. I had fun doing this, and I met a lot of new bloggers, but damn people, I'm tired, I'm bloated, I'm stuffed and I'm hung over. I need to go recuperate.

Freedom hurts those left behind

She's been gone all day, found a way to experience the world and took it. The problem is, in her haste to run fast and free, she forgot who she was leaving behind.

The world will be a new and strange and scary place tonight, and who will be there to hear her cries? Those she left behind will be at home waiting and watching, and she will have no clue how to find her way back to them.

Lady is out there somewhere, and for whatever reason, can not get back to Batman and Scooter. They have spent the day looking for her, but to no avail. They are done for the day, and are going home. Their hearts are heavy, fearing the worst. Not knowing for sure, and hoping against all hope that someone finds her and calls them.

I can't make this better. I can't fix it, I can't take the hurt away, or ease the heaviness in their hearts. I can't dry the tears they haven't shed yet, but I can cry my own for them, with them. Not that it will do any good.

Come Home Lady. Come home soon. They miss you and love you and need you.

Finder of Lost Dogs

Is my life really this boring? I have nothing today either. Other than Scooter's dog went in for a day at the salon (yeah, she went to the groomers today) and got away from them. Batman, Scooter, Mom Batman and who ever else they could find, are frantically trying to find Lady. *sigh* With a somewhat major highway close by, that, of course, is their biggest concern.

Thursday 13 (#9)

13 Favorite Things To Eat

1. Anything white chocolate. I used to be a milk chocolate only kind of girl, but then on year for Easter mom bought us white chocolate bunnies, and I was hooked. And now Reese’s has white chocolate and oh my god they are to die for. OH another thing to try? White chocolate and strawberry Hershey’s Kisses. Yup. It’s all good.

2. Cheesecake. Top of the list, New York Style cheesecake. Strawberry cheesecake is good too. Any cheesecake someone else makes…always good. Truthfully, around Thanksgiving, Pumpkin cheesecake even sounds good (yes I have the recipe) and at Christmas? You guessed it, Egg Nog Cheesecake.

3. Steak. But a good steak.. a New York or KC Strip steak. My dad taught me the proper way to eat a good steak…. Medium raw. Well, ok, I have to order it medium rare, but really, I just want it warmed through, and just done on the outside.

4. Broccoli is always good. This place has the best steamed broccoli. I hated broccoli before I got pregnant with Tate. When I was pregnant I couldn’t eat enough of it, and well it stuck. I love it. But not with cheese on it, just steamed with a little butter. I’m good.

5. Seafood, of any kind. Shrimp, lobster, crab legs. Most people, when you say seafood, think this place. Nope, not me. I go here. The best damn margaritas (and the seafood is good too)

6. Italian food. Pasta, of any kind. If there’s seafood in it (shrimp primavera) then bonus! Love me some pasta, and garlic, lots of garlic. Garlic bread too. (and margaritas)

7. Chinese food is good. Sweet and sour anything, cashew chicken, sesame chicken, oh and if you get sweet and sour shrimp, or shrimp fried rice…again bonus. (no margaritas)

8. Mexican food. Give me a chimichanga, a enchiladas, nachos, chips and salsa. Oh, yeah, and (all together now…. ) Margaritas.

9. Anything anyone else cooks for me. Some days, even mac and cheese and hot dogs, or spaghetti-o’s are gourmet if someone else cooks them for me. (and cleans up the mess)

10. Cesar salad Grilled chicken Cesar salad is even better. Now I’ve had some good Cesar salads, and I’ve had bad ones. It’s hard to screw em up, but apparently not impossible.

11. Ice cream. Absolute favorite? Baskin Robbin’s Peanut butter and chocolate. After this post, does this really surprise anyone? Seriously? My mother always ate Jamocha Almond Fudge, and now I’m as predictable as my mother. 31 flavors, I chose the same one every. Single. Time.

12. Mashed potatoes and gravy. Thank you Dad. It was a life commandment for us. We LOVE mashed potatoes and gravy. Newt is right there with me. Why can’t we have mashed tators and gravy for breakfast? It’s good for you and better than sugar coated cereal. (is she really my kid?)

13. Mrgaritas…do those count? Oh wait, it’s my list, I decide what counts, and well margaritas count.




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A crumb of nothingness

I have nothing today. I guess I spewed it all yesterday and exhausted my stores of worthless information and meaningless drivel. Today, I am bone dry. I have nothing to blog about, nothing inspires me, nothing screams at me "Share me! Tell 'em about me!"

There was a lot of fun on Yahoo today, but I can't/won't share it. TMI really, and it's not reader friendly.


OOHHH I do have this to share.

Remember this picture? The week we got back from Daytona I got the canvas print back, and I love it. It is, to date, the biggest print of any of my pictures. Anyway, never mind what it does to me to see it... tonight we give it to Dad Batman. (who is home from the hospital. But I'm not sure I can say with any confidence that he's doing better) I am really excited to see his reaction to the print, and there will be a bit of pride in my heart when I see it hanging in the house in the future.

Yeah, that's all for now. Sorry

Dear Internet

As vast and as unending and chock full of information and meaningless drivel, I find it hard to believe you fail to keep me entertained while I am at work. Sadly, today that is so. What's a bored girl to do at work? Please don't even suggest the obvious, work. If I was doing that, I wouldn't be bothering you would I?

Thanks for nothing today. Maybe tomorrow will be better.

Love,
Becky

Shhhh don't tell.. but I think the secret's out

Uh, if they're secret, why did I find them on Google News?

Somebody needs to look up the word Secret in the dictionary.

Ain't that the truth

Overheard in the office

Now feel this one. Don't be afraid to show your lady customers the heftier one. Some women like to have something with a larger diameter in their hand.

~~~~~~~~~~
Yahoo convo after reading this post:
M: are you kidding me
B: nope
M: what the hell were they talking about
B: pens
M: nice
B: funny shit though huh?
M: My eyes are blurry I thought you said penis
B: THats' even funnier!!!!!!!!!!!!!
M: drink all over computer?
B: rockstar spewed on screen
B: You know I'm adding this shit don't you?
M: go ahead

And I thought I had nothing to blog about today.

I love me some Reese's

I love me some Reese's.

This kind
Not, this kind. Ok, well, that's a lie. I like 'em both, but you get what I'm getting at.

Anyway, (sheesh, I get so side tracked, so easily..Huh? Did some one say chocolate? Oh wait. I'm trying to tell a story here.)

As I was saying, I love me a Reese's. I remember my very first one. I wasn't but about 4 or 5 and my father was still teaching at a local technical school (now a technical college.) (they grew up apparently) and mom took me there one day after classes.

Now, when dad was teaching, I remember being told that money was tight back then. Uh I was 4, what did I know, or care about money? I remember the stories of times we had little to nothing to eat. I don't know. I don't remember wanting for anything, really. They could have just made those stories up, but I seriously doubt it. (Damn I've got some serious blabber mouth going on today)

So, mom. Me. After classes. Dad. Yeah, we go to meet dad after classes one day. I don't know why, it wasn't a regular occurrence, we just did. Dad, on the other hand, had to meet with another teacher after classes, so it was going to be a little bit. (where is my brother in this story, in this memory? He had to be 2, and I know they didn't leave him at home? HHMMMMM)

We're (mom, dad, me...brother is still MIA) walking down the hallway of one of the buildings (the math building I think, that's what my dad taught, and so it would make sense, but that's really beside the point and has no bearing on this story. Where is my little brother?) and we come upon a vending machine. WAHOO! Candy!

Mom? Dad? One of them (obviously not my brother, where is he?) asks me if I want a candy bar? Oh hell to the yeah ( and little brother won't get any. That'll show him to go missing. HA!) so I stand there like a...well, like a kid in a candy store because, well, that's kind of what I was. (So obvious) I'm standing there nose pressed up against the glass, and drool hanging off my chin (well, not really, but you get it) and I'm wondering.. do I get the snickers which I know I will like, or do I branch out and try something different? Oh, wait, remember that Mounds bar you had? Yeah, they said coconut and almonds and all you heard was almonds. Don't want to make that mistake twice. Better ask before you pick.

Hey mom? What does that orange one have in it?
Peanut butter and chocolate
*thinking to myself* I like peanut butter. She did say peanut butter right? Yeah. I like chocolate. She didn't say coconut did she? uummmmm No. Good.
Hey Mom, no coconut in there right?
No, no coconut.
Ok, I want that one.

I got the Reese's, and opened it. OH BONUS! There's two! (Thank god little brother is still missing or I would have to give him one. ) So I ate the first one, in a hurry (so little bro couldn't get it, if he ever showed up) and that second one? Yeah, it lasted for freakin' ever. I nibbled and nibbled on that thing for a lifetime (Ok, probably only 2 minutes but when you're 4, that's almost forever). From that day on, Reese's always won out, even over Snickers. And I still, to this day, eat the first one fast as I can, and nibble on the second one as long as I can.

Was there a point to this? UH...no. Just sharing.

You're welcome.

An Open Letter to The Slug

Dear Slug,

I’m going to try and explain this as slowly and calmly as I can, so that you can grasp the full meaning of what I am about to tell you.

I am not to blame for the problems in your life. You can not go around blaming me for the fact that your life is not going the way you want it to. You give me way too much credit. First, I don’t have any power in your life, I don’t control the things around you. Second, I don’t care enough to be that involved or that informed with your life. I just don’t.

Having said that, can I ask a simple question? Is it possible that CSE is garnishing your wages and holding your tax refunds because maybe you actually owe all that child support? Is it possible that when you don’t send the girls any money for a month, it’s safe to say no one else does either and therefore the child support goes unpaid. And is it also possible that every month that the child support goes unpaid, it adds up until you are over $2000 behind and I’m left with no other option but to get it from you before you spend it on yourself?

I will admit that I foolishly believed you when you told me you would send me money every Friday if I would not garnish your wages. I gave you the benefit of the doubt, even though my past experiences with you told me this was a trick and wouldn’t last. You foolishly didn’t listen and didn’t believe me when I told you I would not garnish your wages if you paid me every week, but the first time you missed a payment, the very first week you didn’t send money I would call CSE. You missed a week, I made a phone call.

You asked me today how I expected you to live on half a paycheck. Again, I’m sorry, but that really is not my concern, nor is it my problem. The truth of the matter is, you wouldn’t be in this predicament at all if you had just paid your child support on time, all along. How is this predicament my fault? Yes, I did call CSE, but you didn’t pay your child support.

I’ll even do you one better. That week you missed a payment? If you had called me a couple of days earlier and explained the whole situation to me, I would have been willing to work out some kind of arrangement with you. I truly meant it when I said I was done fighting with you and wanted us to find a way to get along and work things out. Instead, you called me after the payment was due (and not paid) and told me “I’m not sending any money, so do whatever you have to do.” You really left me with no choice but to hold up my end of the agreement. Don’t believe me that I would have worked something out with you? Did you not call me two weeks prior and ask me if you could send a reduced amount that week so that you could have gas money? Did I not agree to that without a fight, a fuss, or even pouting? I readily agreed, because you called upfront and asked without looking for a fight.

The girls get told, If you do that, this will happen. And we follow through with it. Same goes for you. I told you, if you do that, this would happen. I had to follow through. If I let is slide one time, you would try again and again.

I am sure you think that not paying your child support somehow hurts me. Frankly, not really. I manage to get all the bills paid on time, every month. I manage to make sure the girls have lunch money and clothes and shoes and everything they absolutely need. It’s the extra things, like a back up pair of shoes, or trips to the movies with their friends, or dinner out on special occasions, or movies and pizza nights on weekends, books from book clubs at school, the latest and greatest hair ponies, the things that make girls..well, girls that they don’t have because well, I don’t have the child support you’re supposed to be sending.

That money isn’t my money. It’s for the girls. Truth be told, you don’t even pay me enough to pay the sitter for watching them after school. The girls are truly missing out on a lot of things because I just don’t have the money for it.

So, do you see what I’m saying here? This predicament you’re in right now with CSE holding your tax refunds, and now taking half your paycheck isn’t my fault at all. You made this mess. You did this, in a misguided attempt to hurt me and make me suffer. I do not control your life, and I am not to blame for your unhappiness. I have my own life to live, I can’t be bothered with trying to control yours too.

Just pay the child support you owe your daughters, and get on with your life. Our life together is over. I’m never coming back. Stop hopping and dreaming I will. You have never given me a reason to consider coming back, but you continually remind me why I left. Let it go, move on, find happiness. It is not with me.

And pay your child support.

Calgon take me away.....

Is there a short bus to reality? Is there any bus to reality? Uh, could someone please get Slug a ticket?

I often wonder what color the sky is in his world. And how horrible it must be to live in a place where everyone is out to get you and screw you over and keep you down. Yes, The Man is keeping The Slug down.

I'm trying really hard (don't laugh...I am) to find sympathy for him, but uh, yeah, I'm falling a bit short. Ok a lot.

All of my bloggity friends know that he's behind in his child support. (Now $1638) From reading my previous posts here and here, we all know that Slug and I had and agreement that he would pay me every Friday. If he missed 1 payment I would call CSE and garnish his wages. He did. I did. Now he's pissed. Because apparently I wasn't supposed to really hold up my end of the agreement.

See, it turns out that the paperwork got put through the week after he missed his first payment. HMMM. I wonder why? Oh, yeah, The Man is holding him down. The Man is out to get him. The Man is screwing him over. Yeah, couldn't be b/c he's screwing his daughters (who, let's review...mean the world to him) out of money that is rightfully theirs.

He's going to call CSE today and chew their asses for holding on to his money. (I guess he thinks they will release it and he'll get it?) Which is fine. I hope he does call them, and gets them to release that $$, I'll get it that much sooner. He's going to chew their asses because they are taking half his paycheck to cover his child support obligation. He had the gall to ask me "How am I supposed to live on half a paycheck?" Uh the same way you have expected me and your daughters to live without any child support.

If he doesn't get the answers he wants at CSE, he's going to the State to complain.

I seriously don't know what he expects to get or what he expects to happen. The man OWES us $1600+ in child support. CSE is going to make sure we get it. All the bitching in the world isn't going to get that money away from CSE and give it to him. He owes back child support in the amount of $1638 and next week it will go up to $2088.

My horoscope today is: This situation should come labeled with a big Handle with Care sticker. Unfortunately, things are rarely that obvious. It's up to you and your amazing sensitivity to sniff them out and defuse things.

Why is it always up to me?

Why I love Batman, reason # 459

Your Body Image is 40% Unhealthy, 60% Healthy

You're body image is quite healthy, though you're sometimes a little bit too hard on yourself. Chances are you've got a rockin' body - so enjoy it!

How's Your Body Image?

Uh, yeah, I have always had body image issues, but I'm aware of them. The other night laying in bed with Batman, watching TV, there was a VS commercial on. B asked me..."So, any of those girls do-able?" (yeah, it's a strange game we play) and I said. UH NO!
What do you mean no? None of them are hot? Excuse me?
Uh, No. They're plenty hot. But did you see them?
Well yeah.
Yeah, they totally blow me away. I'd be too intimidated by them. They are so much hotter than me. I couldn't stand up next to them
I think you could. I think you blow them away.

See why I love him? He's blind and crazy.

The Languages of Love

Race Mom replied to my post about Batman, and the elusive three words I thought I needed to hear. She said that there area actually five love languages.

Physical Touch
Acts of Service
Time
Words of Affirmation
And Gifts

I think I may have known this from some of the things my father studied and taught when he was a minister. I also know that some people are visual people, some are audio people and some are verbal people. I am a verbal person. Batman is more visual. I will tell him I love him. He shows me he loves me. I need to remember to listen to the language he speaks, instead of insisting he speak the language I can hear.

Of the 5 languages of love, which ones does he use? All of them actually. I would do good to remember them and look for them and listen for them. So, while he doesn't say those three words, he tells me he loves me, every single day. I just need to realize it.

While it will be a wonderful gift from him when he finally does say those words, and I will know then that he truly means them, it's still hard to wait some times. In the mean time, I need to listen with my eyes, and my heart and my soul. The feelings are there, even if the words are not yet.

The Invitations to our Red Neck Blog Party

Ok, it's just an idea right now, but apparently there is some interest in a red neck blog party. (Who knew?) IF and that's a BIG IF we decide to do this, we will let you all know....

Race Mom (who is one of the coolest mom's I met at the Ultimate Blog party... Yeah, her family races-zoom zoom- and she lives close by!) sent me this little quiz to see just how red neck I am. I'm not sure I'm red neck enough to host this party.

You Are 25% Redneck

The wheels still turning, but the hamster's dead. You're just fakin' bein' a redneck.

How Redneck Are You?

Here's the quiz, and my answers:

Do you have a broken fridge or washer on your porch? No, I do not have either on my front porch, nor have I ever.

Do you park cars in your lawn? We did this more than once, when I was married to the Slug, and we had a party, but on a regular basis? Nope

Do you decorate your house with free beer or cigarette merchandise? I don’t decorate my house with free beer or cigarette merchandise, but I’m sure some of my wardrobe was provided by Anheiser Busch. I do have more than a few Die Cast NASCAR cars sitting in my living room

Have any relatives that are two things at once (like a sister in law and an aunt?) Uh, does it count that Batman is actually The Slug’s 3rd cousin and therefore he’s related to my daughters?

Is your idea of a fancy dinner Red Lobster? Not mine, but when I was married to The Slug his idea of a fancy dinner was eating Cap’n D’s inside (not getting drive thru)

Have you ever been in a burping contest before? Uh, yeah, My brother and I sat on either side of our mother on our way back home from Florida and decided to have a contest, with her as the judge.

Do you consider any town with a Super Wal-Hell to be “the City”? Nope.

Is your idea of a great vacation Daytona Beach, Florida? Uh.... I just got back from Daytona Beach Florida, because we went to see the Daytona 500. Guess I get bonus points for that huh?

Have you ever taken your sweetie to a monster truck rally for a date? I’ve never taken anyone but I agreed to go to more than a few of them when I was married to The Slug. Did he ever agree to go see Phantom of the Opera with me? Are you kidding?

Do you know people who have been on Jerry Springer? I very well could have been on Jerry Springer.

Are you prejudiced against anyone with a Yankee accent? Nope

Is your idea of great foreplay professional wrestling? Uh, no. But when I was married to C1 and working at a local drug store, a professional wrestler came into the store, and damned if I didn’t recognize him. NO I did not ask for his autograph (even though C1 begged and begged me to)

Does it take almost a half week’s pay to fill up your truck with gas? Not yet but with the price of gas going up....maybe

Do you light off fireworks any time you feel like celebrating? Oh hell yeah. I buy extra when they’re half price and save them for Christmas and New Year’s Eve.

Did you learn to drive on a tractor? Nope

Have you ever been hunting? I went hunting with The Slug the first deer season we dated. I sat in snow for 2 hours and froze my ass off. Never saw a deer and never went back. We did process our own deer meat every year, and deer season was always second only to Christmas in our house. I Do NOT miss deer season at all.

Do you think truck stop restrooms are actually pretty clean? EW! NO!

Do you think Cherry Skoal is a romantic Valentine’s Day Gift? Never buy that stuff

Was the first theme park you ever visited Dollywood? Have never been but I know it’s in Pigeon Forge.

Do you think ‘The South will rise again”? Uh, not without medical intervention (inside joke)

A blogger by any other name...eh would still be me

I was blog surfing working today when this happened to catch my eye over at Norman's place. So I thought I'd steel borrow it.

YOUR REAL NAME: We’ll go with Becky

YOUR GANGSTA NAME (1st 4 letters plus izzle): Beckizzle (uh isn’t he some famous soccer player who just collected a ginormous paycheck and then blew out his knee?)

YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (fave color + fave animal): Black Dog (the obvious answers: Black stallion or Black panther were both so unbelievable, and too easy)

YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name + childhood street): Denise Major (Yeah, sis, that was the only street name I could remember.. oh, there was Morgan. Not much better.)

YOUR STAR WARS NAME (last 3 letters of your last name + first 2 letters of your first name + first 3 letters of Mom's maiden name): (ok, this is starting to sound like the combination to my kids locker at school…3 turns to the left STOP, 2 turns to the right STOP, one turn left, and bada bing ya got it!) Oodbetho (uh Shakespeare anyone?)

YOUR SUPER HERO NAME (2nd fave color + fave drink): Green Margarita (Do I care what color it is? As long as the tequila is top shelf we’re good) (I wonder what super powers I have?)

YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name + 3rd letter of your last name + any letter of your middle name + 2nd letter of your Mom's maiden name + 3rd letter of your Dad's middle name + 1st letter of a sibling's first name + last letter of your Mom's middle name): Here we go again with the locker combination…. Eonhbsn (Uh, yeah, I’m sure that means Bite me somewhere)

YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION PROGRAM NAME (Grandma/Grandpa's first name + Jones): Velma Jones (I’m sure she knows Scooby and Shaggy)

YOUR GOTH NAME (Black + name of one of your pets): Black JT (you don’t want to know what JT stands for. Just suffice it to say C1 was a huge Star Trek fan. You figure it out)

YOUR AMERICAN IDOL NAME (fav car and sea food) Beemer Shrimp (I was going to go with Beemer Lobster, but it just doesn’t roll off the tongue the way Beemer shrimp does)

NAME OF YOUR DREAM BAND (name of computer + printer): Dell Lexmark (I'll bet he's next to step up and claim to be Anna Nicole's babydaddy)

MOVIE STAR NAME (sibling's middle name + mother-in-law's maiden name): Jean Lawn (not altogether bad)

YOUR ALTER EGO NAME (name of one your childhood pets + popular brand of clothes when you were young): Snowy OP (as in Ocean Pacific… and you always had to have a hoodie or it wasn’t official)

YOUR LAWYER NAME (fav actor's last name + fav hard liquor): Bloom Tequila (gonna be hard to take me seriously in the courtroom when it sounds like I’m using my porn star name)

Your HIP HOP NAME (favorite candy+ fruit) Smarties Banana (that can go sooo wrong on so many different levels.)

My party may be a little too wild, but is sure is fun

The Blog Party continues! I just checked the invitation list, and the list of bloggers participating is 697. No wonder I'm exhausted.

Truth is, most of them are stay at home, home-schooling mom's who are married to their fabulous best friend. *sigh* I feel out of place because my life is around the corner, and on the wrong side of the tracks from where they live.

So, I'm sure when they show up here for the party, the head banging loud music, the adult beverages margaritas and beer, and the passed out bodies in the front yard, will undoubtedly offend most of them. Not mention I drop the occasional F-bomb around here. (Oops!)

So, while I'm sure there are a lot of really great mom's out there, and really, I applaud your ability to stay home with your kids, and home school them, I just can't relate. I have to work outside the home, I'm the only source of income my family has. I have to send my kids to public school, left to their own devices, they'd end up in jail. I'm glad to see some of the mom's have come by for a visit, but I completely understand if you don't stay long. I wonder if there wasn't a mass email sent out to everyone and prayer vigils being held today to pray for my soul's salvation from eternal damnation.

PS: M and I were talking today that maybe we should host our our blog party, for all the real party animals out there who have more than a little red in their necks. M said she wasn't sure too many people could sober up and stop blowing shit stuff up long enough to come to our party. But just think of the awesome blog posts we would have!!!!

If I had wings

If I had wings I would fly away from here. I would follow my heart, to Batman and his family. I'm no good here right now, today. I wouldn't be any better there. I can't do anything, but at least I could be there, with him, with them. And he wouldn't have to be alone.

Batman called me after I got to work today, and told me Father Batman was going to the hospital. Since he's fighting cancer, hospital is never a nice word. But it's a fact of life, for everything, major and minor. You just never know which it is.

Batman told me it was just an adverse reaction to the medication they have him on right now. His face is swollen. Batman was sketchy at best with details, but Mother Batman is always sketchy with details, so B didn't have much to work with.

Every minute that passes without a phone call is agonizing for me, but, it's also a bit of a relief. If it was life threatening, and serious, he would be on the phone screaming for me to be by his side. As it is, he's not calling me for that, so I wait, until we have a better, clearer picture of the situation. Still, waiting is hard, and not knowing is harder.

So, while my physical body and presence is here today, my heart and my mind, are gone. If I had wings I would fly to him, but as it is, my heart is with him, as always.

ETA: 1:45PM They are taking Father Batman home right now. At least we know what it is. But I don't have details other than that.

Actions speak louder than words

I got hung up on words last week. Oh, no, not saying them. We all know I have no problem finding words to spout off with. No, I got hung up on my need want to hear those three magical words from B.

Yes, it was selfish on my part. Thank god I threw my little temper tantrum with M instead of voicing all of this to Batman.

When I got done pouting about the fact that he's just not there yet, and the words I want to hear him say won't be said for a while just yet. I sat down and realized something even better.

He may not be able to say those three words to me just yet (for a lot of reasons, all of which I know and understand) but that doesn't mean he doesn't feel those feelings. You might ask (or maybe not, but I did) If he feels it why won't he say it? The truth is? He does say it, just not with words.

He does so many things for me that show me, tell me, how he feels, if I would just shut up long enough to hear it.
Just this morning, at 7:00 he called me. I, of course, asked him "What's wrong?"
Nothing's wrong why would something be wrong?
Because you don't call me in the morning usually.
Well, not in a while, but I wanted to call to see how your morning's going.
And he stayed on the phone with me listening to me get the girls out the door, get gas, drop the girls off at school, and drive to work. He shared a good 45 minutes of my morning with me.

He calls me every night after work, on his way home, just to share his day with me. He chats with me on Yahoo during the day, if we both have time. He calls me every night before we go to sleep to tell me Sweet Dreams. He calls me several times on my drive to his house, to see where I am, and to tell me Please be careful.

In Florida, he got up every morning, and drove to the gas station near by to get us both huge cups of coffee, and gave me time to get in the shower and get started on my morning routine (which is so much longer and extensive than his).

He understood one afternoon, that my hair had gotten mussed and out of sorts when we were taking a nap (really we did take a nap) and he waited patiently, without bitching at all, while I took another shower and redid my hair and make up from the very beginning again (that's an hour wait time folks...seriously). But he knew I would be less than comfortable, (I would be miserable) if I went out to dinner with him that night, looking less than great.

He knew I hated my hair for most of my life, so he stepped up and took care of the problem. I have loved my hair every day since then. (And I have said Thank you to him every week since then too).

He got his hair cut last week, and the place that did his hair, also did mani's and pedi's and facials, and massages, and he told me, 'If you're good, I'll spring for a day here for you, with the works.' and I know that he will do it.

He made me tell him about my trip to Daytona last year, especially all the bad parts, so that he could do things completely different and make this year's trip so much better for me. (And he did)

He made arrangements for me to have a shopping buddy one day, he has found the latest uber-awesome photo-editing software for me, he is saving me a ton of $$ by trying to fix my PC for me...seriously, I could go on and on about all the things he's done for me. The bottom line is he may not use words to say I love you, he finds other ways. And if I would just shut up and be quiet, I could (and do) hear them. Every. Single. Day.

Worth everything

Can I just say that hearing the excitement and the joy in an 11 year old's voice over the phone, after he has just spent 4 hours with just his dad watching his hero win the last race he'll ever get to see him race in, and hearing him say 'This night was the best night of my life" and "This is the best motocross race I've ever been too" is worth everything I had to give up and set aside and sacrifice? And I would do it all again, in a heartbeat, without batting an eye.

And knowing Dad has some pretty cool memories of that night too? Yeah, that's icing on the cake.

My glamorous life, who wants to be just like me?

The Blog party continues. We are (at last count) 565 strong, but I'm sure it will be growing. I don't know how anyone who reads any blogs at all could miss out on this. There are banners flying everywhere.

So, I decided to check out how many new hits I had to my blog this morning, and while I was there I would find out who among my friends had come by too.

Yeah, turns out my past is still lurking in my life. ARGH

I know, this is a public blog, and it's posted on the Internet for the entire free world to see. That's fine. I could protect it, but then I would miss out on meeting so many new, cool and exciting people. I guess what bothers me the most is the fact that I have worked hard and been through all kinds of hell to get my life free from my past, and yet, they still lurk and stalk me, even here. Is there no part of my life that they can just leave alone?

They have now taken to searching for "Batman in St. Charles", so now, not only are they stalking me, they are stalking Batman. For no other reason than I fell in love with him. He's done nothing wrong, and he's certainly done nothing to them, and yet they just can't leave him alone.

They yell and scream and threaten me to leave them alone. They preach on and on about how they want nothing more than for me to get the hell out of their lives. FINE! I've done that. Believe me I don't give a rat's ass what you do with your life. But if you really want me out of your life, stay the f@#k out of mine. And that includes my cyber life too.

Why can't you all just go the hell away and let me live my life in peace? Why do you feel the need to stalk me on line and know every single freaking blasted move I make, every thought I have, every thing I say and do? You know for people who yell and scream about privacy, you sure have no problem invading mine.

Yes, I know there are solutions to this. I could require people to log into my blog (yeah, that sounds like fun) or I could stop blogging altogether but doing anything at all, means they have the power to censor and control and manipulate me and fuck them they don't deserve that power.

SO, Forces of Evil, I know you're out there, I know you have your spies working on stalking me too. I know you are lurking here, and don't have the balls it takes to step out of the shadows and own up to it. You're lurking in the dark corners, watching and stalking and obsessing. That's fine. I won't change a damn thing I say or do here. I will continue to call The Slug the Slug, b/c he is a worthless ass who thinks that not paying his child support hurts me. That just means his children (who he claims mean the world to him) go without things they both need and want. And every month he drags his feet and doesn't pay is another month behind he will get and well, he'll have to pay it eventually. Some way, some how. I will continue to call the heifer he's living with TFC because that is exactly what she is. I will continue to believe his twin brother is a sick twisted pedophile because well, he's been convicted of such crimes, against his own step daughter.

I will continue to write about my glamorous life and all it's glory. And you all can continue to stalk and obsess over my blog, b/c well, I understand. I truly am that amazing and wonderful and who the hell wouldn't want to be just like me?