Too many demands, not enough man

There have been several emails shared between us today. I can tell he's exhausted, and stressed, and there is very little left of him to give. I am willing to wait for him to recharge his batteries, even if that means it takes 2 weeks. As long as I know that some time, in the future, when he's 'back among the land of the living' there will be some time for us, I'm willing to give him the time and space he needs now.

I say that, and write that, as if I actually have a choice in the matter. Truth is, I don't. Whether I'm willing or not, he will take what he needs. He needs time, he needs space, he needs sleep, rest, he needs a break. None of which are in sight at this point. He will take them when he can get them, and if given a choice between spending time with me, and getting what he needs, the needs will win out, hands down.

To love him, means to give him what he needs most. If I smother him, he will just run farther and farther away. If you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it was meant to be. Sometimes the best way to hold on to something is with an open hand. You can hold more water or sand in an open hand than you can in a clenched fist. Time to open the hand, and trust he will do what he needs to do for himself, and when there's enough of him to give, he will. Right now, there are so many demands being made on him, there is nothing left to give. He's being pulled in too many directions, and I need to realize I was selfishly making demands on him, demand he could not meet.

I heard what you couldn't say today, B. I get it. I wish I could help, but I can't. Know that I would if I could, and all you have to do is ask. Take care of you, deal with the family, love the kids, and know that I'll be right here, when there is enough of you to go around my way. As long as I know I have 'someday' (and I know that I do), I'll wait for someday.